Happy Clappy Bible Rappy

Tuesday night, D and I are getting ready to go out, son G appears with girlfriend E.

G "How do I make pancakes?"
Y "You`ll need flour and eggs."
G "Is it shrove Tuesday today?"
Y "I`ve no idea, I`m not religious."
G "It`s got nothing to do with religion, I`m asking about pancakes."



A peel of laughter came from the bedroom from E. I joined in and G didn`t understand.

G "Have we got any pancake mix then?"
Y "No."
G "Right then, let`s just go to the chip shop."

Not his fault really, we`re all purely secular in this house. I`ve never tried to force any kind of ethos onto my lads. Some of this has to be blamed on my mother`s choice of husband after her divorce from dad. A bible reading fanatic. Not that I`ve anything against people who believe, some of my best friends are christians, but they don`t ram it down my throat every second of the day. One memory.... I called on my mam and T, he had his bible open on cue. I mentioned a documentary I`d watched on John Lennon.

T "You watch programmes about THAT man?"
Y "Yes, It was very interesting."
T "But, he was a bad man, he took drugs!!"
Y "He had problems."

Then he went back to sticking his nose in the bible. He used to blat on about sin, smoking, drinking and gambling, but he did all of these when he thought we weren`t looking.

Another brilliant Ten by Ten at the Cumberland. Great to see everyone again and the standard was sky high. Comedy, Rap and Music, what more could we ask?

There`s to be a Lyrical Slam on Thursday 19th March at 8.00 at the Cumberland Arms. You need four songs which you can`t sing, but can perform in any way. You can remove words from the song, but not add any. Should be good fun, but can`t think of anything, but would love to see it, maybe get an idea for the next one. Or....what about Lily Marlene in a Geordie accent....no.. don`t get me started on songs from the nazi era, had enough from step dad!!!

Good laugh of the week, speaking to an old fella in the art group. We were talking about where we used to live, Benwell.

J "My dad could speak fluent bad language."
Y "Where were you born?"
J "Back Gluehouse Terrace, but the only time we were stuck up was when we were wallpapering."

Aye the owld uns are the best.